31 August 2009

Prayer of a True Sinner

I am nothing more, nothing less, than a sinner. Even in its mildest form. I would consider myself unworthy of anything except the wrath of God. I know that many of you are shaking your heads right now, wondering what I could have done. But trust me, I have sinned. Everyone has sinned. Even though I feel that I am a completely undeserving human being, a simple detestable rodent in the eye of God, He sees me as his child. He sees me as the servant to him that I am. Even with sin in my life, he knows that I love him. That is why I LOVE God as my father. He is the best one you can find. This blog isn't prompted by any one thing except me. Most people ask that I write some things, or many things in this blog I just stumble upon the realization of, but this is one - this one is truly a prayer. A prayer that I can live in the image of God - everyday. I know He is with me. I know that He is beside me. I will no longer live with God, I will live for Him. I will no longer be a stray cat that God looks after, but a loyal hound dog frantically searching for everyone who needs him.

In my life I have treated myself with the lowest form of sin. I have sinned, knowing that I can control the particular impulse of the sin. I have learned, that unless I actually teem the radiance of God, I will never treat myself like a Godly man. In fact, I wouldn't consider myself a man until now. A man as a human, but still a toddler in my faith. Manhood is brought about by a specific event. Manhood is brought about by the acting like one. Manliness doesn't come from any one thing except your ability to control yourself. Sin is regular. But I CAN control it. It's up to me. In my faith I have now learned to walk, I have now grown enough to know what hurts, I have grown enough to have conditioned myself not to do things. For, before this, the conditioning should have been done already. But now, I realize that it wasn't. I conditioned myself to ask for forgiveness instead of treating my body like a temple of God. I have learned that what I have done is damaging to me and those in my life. I can resist, I just have to try.

This prayer is not just for me, but for everyone. For every sinner who knows the deserve nothing more than the wrath of God. I know that I don't deserve the love and forgiveness of God, but that is why I cry when I think of his mercy. I know that deep down, I couldn't forgive myself, but God - God can forgive any circumstance. I know that the Declaration of Independence I made before now was not truly heart felt. It felt like it came from the heart, but it came from my mind. I know now that what I must do is live in His image - ALL THE TIME! For God is Good all the time, why should I expect less from myself? Why would I allow myself to sin thinking that I am just human? Don't misunderstand me, I know that sin will happen. But I CAN do everything in my power to stop from ruining my relationship with my Father.

The wrath of God is dreadfully revolting. And truthfully I know that I deserve that. I deserve to be treated the way he would treat any other common rodent. But I know that God will treat me with mercy and kindness. I know that when I ask God to forgive he does. His almighty power doesn't stop at wrath - it continues into love. His love is greater than any other kind of love given. For He loves everyone. Sinners, Saints, Angels, and Humans. He treats them with the same respect he treats his only Son. I fall to my knees in adoration for His greatness. I raise my hands in respect for his power. I send my heart to Him with love for his compassion.

No one Christian will know the point in their life when they learn that they TRULY are living for God. I know now that I have been building up to this in my servitude. For my love runs deep, but His love runs so much more deep than any feeble river I can make. But I pray to resolve my life to this: prayer, love, adoration, fear, and respect for my God - my Father. I hold each person accountable for everything I do, as well as everything the people around you do. I know you cannot control my actions, or theirs. But you can show them the Love that God shows to you. You can treat them with the forgiveness God grants to you. You can show that they mean as much to you as your own family. I pray that I can take control of the sin in my life, instead of letting it control me. I resolve that I can treat others with the same respect and kindness shown to me by my Father. I know that I can have love for myself, because of the Love God shows me. I understand that I can do all I can to worship Him. To treat Him with respect. I know that through my persistent perseverance that I can change my life - and the world around me. This is my life. This is my God. This is my prayer.


  1. What is it like having friends that you know do not embrace God?

  2. God makes alive those who are dead in sin. Sin caused death to become part of our existence. Christ came to overcome that, in that we may have life through him. We must ask ourselves do we live for Christ? Or just exist?
    He allows us the choice of whether or not to surrender our lives to Him. His desire is to have us to live Godly lives, He has empowered us to make that decision. When we sin, we do and will again, we should be quick to confess and repent. As we allow the Holy Spirit to live through us, we will be more able to resist sin and become more like Christ.
    To Him be the power forever and ever.
    love you, love your blogs. pam

  3. Melanie, the feeling is not one I can describe. I feel the need to pray for them, and help them understand God. Sometimes people don't accept him and trust him, because they don't know him. I would hope that my friends would come and ask me about him. I can't do anything unless they're willing to learn and try. That's not centered toward you, or anything like that - it's just how I feel.